The Moon Under Water

    In 1946 George Orwell wrote a famous piece in the Evening Standard about his favourite London pub, The Moon Under Water. He described it as possessing all the key attributes of what makes a good urban pub, including an old-fashioned, comfortable layout and decor (preferably Victorian in design), draught stout and a range of other beers available, lunches and snacks at an affordable price, friendly barmaids (although not too friendly: "pubs where the barmaid calls you ‘ducky’ always have a disagreeable raffish atmosphere"), a music-free atmosphere that's "quiet enough to talk"in and a large garden where families with children can sit. What Orwell doesn't tell us until the end of the article is that The Moon Under Water is a fictitious ideal rather than an actual pub, a sort of Utopia of drinking-holes according to Orwell's own somewhat idiosyncratic criteria. Or a composite-portrait bringing together all the most notable qualities about London pubs he knew into one perfect establishment.
   But are Orwell's expectations of what a pub should offer that unusual (barring, perhaps, his strange predilection for china beer-mugs and for "motherly", middle-aged barmaids with dyed hair)? As I embark on this project to unearth and evaluate pubs of quality and distinction of different kinds - whether because of the interesting drinks or food they provide, their historical or literary connections, location, live music, kaleidoscopic beer-mats, who can say - I thought it might be worth attempting to update Orwell's list of important attributes, viewed of course from my own idiosyncratic perspective, as a rough index to what I'm looking for in this blog.
   In the context of a recent report by CAMRA (Campaign for Real Ale) suggesting that 31 pubs per week are currently closing down in the UK, with London and the south-east hardest hit, it seems vital that we take stock of what makes a vibrant, appealing pub in which people are happy to spend some of their increasingly-meagre disposable-income on a regular basis. This blog is intended as an appraisal and celebration of the pub as an integral aspect of British cultural life and if it is currently in decline as a social phenomenon, the only positive to be drawn is that the onus is now on quality rather than quantity, that in a dwindling market pubs need to move beyond the generic and chain-lead and instead focus on what makes them individual and distinctive.
   Layout and décor remain all-important, of course, as few are going to spend time sitting in an unappealing or uncomfortable bar however marvellous (or marvellously inexpensive) the drinks are. There is a trend, particularly in Hackney, for traditional, dimly-lit old-man-y interiors to be retained or harped back to as against the more brightly-coloured, slicker refurbishments that were all the rage a few years ago. Personally I'm not in favour of any one particular style as long as it has something original, inviting and comforting about it: its all about matching décor to both the particularities of the building- design and the mood or atmosphere the pub is trying to evoke (that said, I'm not a fan of the cluttered, mismatched, bric-a-brac-laden Shoreditch manner, which can be like sitting in your grandma's living-room.)    


It does exist! Orwell's ideals have reached their fruition
in this delightful Wetherspoons in Colindale

   Quality of drinks is almost as important, however, as equally (and this happens all too often) so much attention is paid to the coolness of the surroundings that the range and appeal of the drinks on offer - particularly the draught beers (as well as how they're stored and maintained) - is overlooked. We are living through something of a quiet revolution in the quality and appreciation of the UK's beers at present - the buzz-phrase 'craft beer' providing an umbrella for many different kinds of developments, lots of which we'll be looking at on this blog in the coming months - and any contemporary pub worth its salt needs to reflect that. It's no longer sufficient to be offering, say, Carling Black Label/ Fosters, Stella/ Kronenbourg, John Smiths (or some such tepid ditchwater) and the obligatory Guinness, as was fairly standard in many pubs up until a few years ago. There is such a staggering array of exciting, inventive, flavoursome beers cropping up now, often from local breweries, that there's no excuse to be so conservative and unadventurous, even if a certain breed of pub-drinker will always be happy to down several pints of 'wife-beater' a night.
   Affordability of drinks is a significant issue, with pricing varying wildly according to the establishment and area: the downside of the craft-beer phenomenon is that many pubs have seen it as an excuse to dramatically hike their prices for what is presented as a more 'quality', artisanal product. I haven't even got on to wines - so I will leave this complex issue for its own post later on.
    Gardens and other outdoor areas, while not being essential, can be an important aspect of an alluring pub, particularly of course in that fleeting window of sunshine and warmth we recklessly entitle an English summer. Orwell was in fact ahead of his time in this, giving his reason that pubs should be for families as well as the male drinkers who traditionally sought refuge from those very families in the dingy, closed-door privacy of the spit-n-sawdust saloon-bar. In 1984, when Winston Smith visits a "proletarian" pub, it's depicted as a dark,ugly, malodorous den - the contrary, in fact, of Orwell's vision of The Moon Under Water. Pub-owners and landlords have become increasingly creative about incorporating outdoor areas into their designs, for the benefit not just of families and parents with children but also for smokers. Within London in particular, where space is at such a premium, pubs with gardens add another dimension to their appeal, whereas there is also a trend to utilise roof-terraces which afford views of the city.